Wild Horses

Wild horse in the cloudsBeing emotionally defined and having it as your inner authority is not an easy ride. I watch those who have an open non-emotional, undefined system and I see most of them having immediate clarity about what they want in the moment. I get a little jealous but I still love being emotionally defined with the extra juice it gives.

I also see how the open/ non-emotional person can be impacted by me because of my fully defined emotional chemistry. I watch a cool, open emotional Center person get heated up by my passion, my fog of not knowing and missing opportunities because they are too slow and not aware of how they are being impacted.

To me, our open Centers are like wild horses that need a little training with a strong bridle and reign to keep it out of the hands of the mind. And the cowboy hat is for the moments when the ride gets a little bumpy along the emotional wave. When my passionate nature feels like it is going to explode or dive deep into melancholy, I put on my cowboy hat and look in the mirror, chuckle and settle deep into the saddle and say to myself quietly, “here we go”.

When I am working with my wild horse open Throat Center, I see this wild horse that can really get out of control with interrupting, talking too long, talking at the wrong time and doing silly things to get attention to take the pressure off of wanting movement or something to happen to appease my boredom.

When any of those above things happen with my Open Throat Center wild horse, I get embarrassed and feel very foolish. I also notice that they really tend to happen when I am in a strong emotional reaction. It leaves an unpleasant ripple out around me with those I am sharing the moment with.

I put the bridle on and I pull the reigns tight, each moment I socialize or each moment I am urged to initiate. I have also found that with my completely open Throat Center with no activations that I rarely get a chance to talk unless invited into the conversation to speak on a particular subject.

I experiment often. One night in particular while attending a birthday social gathering I decided before exiting the car that I would not engage in conversation, I would not interrupt and I would remain quiet until recognized and called out. Of course, I said “hello” and Happy Birthday”.

That evening, I sat for two hours hardly saying a word. It was as if I was not present. I actually fell asleep in the garden lounge chaise while the rest of the group enjoyed an engaging conversation. It was a little strange but I stayed with it.

At one moment, excited over the conversation of wild mushroom hunting and in a half state of sleep and half awake, I blurted out, “I love Chanterelles”. The conversation went oddly quiet for a second and then picked up where it left off before I blurted out my love for Chanterelles. Everyone in the group completely ignored me. This happens often to me in a social group. I never noticed it before but now I can see it has happened throughout my life. Such is the life of the open Throat Center with zero activation.

I also have discovered that if I am in a group of three, there is not much chance for me to engage so I usually daydream while the two other talk because the topic most likely does not concern or interest me. I realize now that it has always been this way for me.
About the only time I get to talk is when someone asks me about Human Design. That is fine. Then they are interested in hearing what I have to say so it flows out.

I have found that it is best to keep this wild horse in the stable until it’s really time to bring her out. When she gets to talk about Human Design, her Outer Authority, gate 61 gets activated to share a profound truth based upon higher principles. That feels good.
Ajna girl, is really relaxed and doesn’t get too ruffled. Oh, she use to. I remember saying often for many years, “I’m certain, absolutely certain” and being responsible for swaying a person in a particular direction for a decision.

I remember that sinking feeling after saying “I’m certain”, to someone and then going into a hyper questioning marathon in my mind over whether or not I was correct and truly certain.

I learned to keep this one in the green meadow behind the barn. She loves it there. A sign hangs on her gate that reads, “I know nothing and I’m really not sure but you can ask me what I think and then I might tell you and when I do I might giggle because I really know nothing.”

It’s so freeing not to know anything. It’s so liberating to not be responsible for other people’s decisions. When I discovered this little gem of not being sure of anything and not knowing most things, I became immensely relaxed. Not too much to be concerned about when you let go and don’t try to control. You know what I mean?

My other wild horse lives at the top of the stable. It has a grand staircase adorned with white rose bushes and orange summer day lilies.

This horse has recently earned a blue ribbon. I remember last year when the lady with the cat called and told this wild

Horse about her problems and her needs. The wild Head horse loved the lady with the cat and diligently applied all of her energy to find a way to help the lady with the cat.

For three days the wild Head horse deliberated how she might help her friend. She slept one night and woke the next morning with no clarity, a foggy head and a confused mind. She still did not know what she could do to help but she thought some more through out the day and looked for a way.

All day she thought about how she might be able to go to the lady’s farm and sit with her cat while the lady was away. She thought about it all day, looked at the map, prayed and thought some more.

She went to sleep that night thinking that she would wake that next morning with the answer and the solution to how she might help her lady friend with the cat.
The next morning the wild Head horse awoke. The second morning was the same as the first: foggy head, confused mind and absolutely no clarity.

She thought about it all day. She wondered how she might help as she looked at the map again, thought about how long it would take her and how she might stay for an extended period of time, if needed. All day long she thought about how she might be able to help.

That night she went to sleep again and hoped that an answer would come to her in the morning.

In the middle of the night and early in the next morning at about three o’clock or four, the wild Head horse suddenly awoke and saw just what was happening.
She had missed four appointments, forgot to write a very important letter and missed a great opportunity because she was terribly distracted by her friends need.

Suddenly the wild Head horse saw that she had been taken over by a strange force that was trying to drive her away from her beautiful green meadow and top floor stable lined with roses and lilies.

She quickly wrote a letter to her lady friend with the cat informing her that she would not be available to help and that she wished her well in finding a solution to meet her needs. Relieved of the lady and her cat and her needs, the wild Head horse could now focus on her favorite things in her meadow and meet all of her appointments and responsibilities that she had agreed to.

The wild Head horse learned that day that when a friend tells you their problems and fears that most of the time it is best to wish them well and attend to your own appointments, dates, home, responsibilities and your own green meadow.

The wild Head horse won a blue ribbon on that day.

So the roses bloom and the lilies dance as the wild Head horse relaxes and enjoys watching the day go by. She is not in a hurry nor is she bored. She loves to paint, dig small ponds, smell the roses and prance among the lilies, sing songs and tell stories.

open G Center wild horse is another thing. She has a mind of her own and will only come up to the fence for a visit when she feels like it. If an important person shows up on the ranch she will let out a horses winnee and let us all know they are here.

She gets a little out of control though when the meadow gates are left open and she has a chance to run wild all over the ranch and into the different green meadows. She starts repeating certain things that often get annoying like: “Where am I suppose to live?” “Who is my soul mate, my lover, my partner?” “What am I going to do in this lifetime?”

Oh my, it can be too much. But when she gets like this I just tell her to relax and remind her that the open G is about constant movement and learning to evolve love.

I see her begin to understand that we go from pasture to pasture and never become attached to one green meadow over another. She is here to experience it all and become wise so that others will understand the diversity of life.

Her love grows wider too as she loves one horse in one green meadow and then moves to another green meadow to love another horse again. Soon, she realizes that the greatest love of all is the love that is pouring through her and around her, wider and more encompassing than the attachments that she creates with the other horses in the other meadows.

My wild horses remain wild but have become my friends as well. I allow them to be who they are and move at their own pace, in their own way.

Their meadows become greener and greener as they learn to relax and just enjoy. There is no hurry, nowhere to go, nothing to prove, nothing to say, nothing to plan. That’s all just the mind getting ahold of the reigns creating lots of distractions.
They prefer the greener pastures and the lushness of being tranquil, wise and calm in their wildness. Life is so much sweeter.

I love my wild horses.

written by ~ Kashi Stone 2014

My open Centers:

G Center, Throat Center,

Ajna Center and Head Center

Links to open Centers: null

Open Root Center

Open Emotional Center

Open Spleen Center

Open Ego/Will/Heart Center

Open G Center

Open Sacral Center

Open Throat Center

Open Ajna Center

Open Head Center

Written by kashi stone August 2014

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