Human Design and Dating

There has been lots of discussion, lately, regarding a Human Design dating website. It makes me chuckle, I have been there too. A few years into my process with the science, I thought for sure a dating site was the next big answer, even to the point of constructing a website in 2010, working to create a platform for lovers to meet through Human Design.

After approximately six months into the daily, grueling grind of website design, it became incredibly obvious that Human Design could not connect people through a dating platform. No matter how you slice the dice, HD does not fit for mating. It was a big mistake and a huge waste of time and money.

As Ra Uru Hu pointed out repeatedly, dating and romantic love have nothing to do with the Human Design system. 

When I first started studying electromagnetics, it was interesting to watch how my body or mind would respond to the different types of connections. But what I have found is that electromagnetics may be hot and juicy but absolutely useless in making important decisions in life. Electromagnetics create more confusion and mental tapes that really distract and busy the mind; they can be really, really fun, super yum and juicy but very, very tricky. Electromagnetic mental tapes will convince a person into the most incorrect situations, they are very powerful.

The Human Design Bodygraph does not indicate the gender of a person nor the romantic destiny, or the “husband or wife”, nor does one see how many children they are going to have or how long they will be in love.

So, no, Human Design and dating do not go together.  Human Design was designed for: empowerment of self through knowing and understanding how one operates so that one can get the best experiences. Through living that understanding, one naturally travels the path that brings the best experiences, the right people and the correct environment. 

So, how do you love and still be you?

The purpose of Human Design is to learn about who we are, centered and tuned into our body’s voice, not our groin. So, using HD as a tool for mating, relating and creating bonds, is actually working against the goal behind Ra’s vision with this science.  After all, HD does teach the importance of sleeping alone in one’s aura -far away from other bodies in order to empty out and be Self.

Sleeping alone to empty the aura and waking up centered and clear, is the primary place to start so one can see who they truly are. Keep in mind, it takes time to empty the aura when one has shared intimate, sexual space with someone. It can take days, it can take weeks, it can take months even a full year or more, depending on how long one has been merged and how many years one has been sleeping with a lover, dog, neighbor or child near them.

How is Human Design best used?

Human Design does show great connections for working together, creating community together, supporting each other in endeavors and who has the potential to become a good friend or who has the best skill to do what, naturally. Sometimes, people have a difficult figuring out what they do best after they have been conditioned by school, religion and tradition. 

Human Design is also a fabulous tool for understanding the personalities that surround one or who one is working with. If someone is non-emotional and one is emotional, then there may be difficulty relating and communicating; there are going to be misunderstandings, truth may get covered up, hidden, distorted or not spoken and there will be this looming feeling as though both come from two different planets: one is slow and one is very fast.

And then there are the defined Ajna’s. A defined Ajna can be very helpful in many cases. However, they can become difficult for an empty, open head and Ajna who cannot take in so much information. It can quickly, cause a headache.

Usually, a defined Ajna does not wait for an invitation to offer their opinion. Often, they let others “know” what they know. A question I often hear from a defined Ajna is “Would you like to hear about this?” It’s difficult to be honest because if one responds with “no’, it can seem rude.

Equally challenging are the open Throat beings. The “unaware”, open Throat Center being aches for attention with a streaming, non-stop, download of information and continuous interruptions. It is best for the open Throat to not speak first, allowing the defined to initiate conversation. It makes a huge difference in relating in the world, just understanding that simple rule.

And last, most importantly, is the relationship dynamic of the undefined and defined ego. As Ra has stated in his lectures on romance, the undefined ego will compete with the defined ego until death. This is an obvious truth in my experience. Often, undefined Ego’s copy the work of the defined ego that they are hoping to destroy and desperately seek power over while they strategize the demise of reputation and vie for positioning. Electromagnetics or not, it does not matter, the combination of the two definitions creates fertile ground for serious, unpleasant troubles and horrible, unnecessary battles. Thank heavens for the law of karma that brings balance. No need to expend such energy. 

What we find is that the key in romance is taking lots of SPACE so that one can feel their own chemistry and true definition.

In the awareness one’s true self, a direction is chosen towards fulfilling one’s life path and destiny. That is how one uses Human Design.

But the mind…….ahhhh the mind loves a good story.

Enjoy learning and watching the mechanics.



Kashi Stone 2015

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